The wife's back on the warpath again.
She was up for making a sex movie last night, and all I did was suggest we should hold auditions for her part.
I've accidentally swallowed some Scrabble tiles.
My next crap could spell disaster.
My sister-in-law sat on my glasses and broke them.
It was my own fault. I should have taken them off.
I spent a couple of hours defrosting the fridge last night,
or "foreplay" as she likes to call it.
After both suffering from depression for a while, me and the wife were going to commit suicide yesterday.
But strangely enough, once she killed herself, I started to feel a lot better.
So I thought, "Screw it, soldier on!"
I woke up this morning at 8, and could sense something was wrong.
I got downstairs and found the wife face down on the kitchen floor, not breathing!
I panicked. I didn't know what to do.
Then I remembered McDonald's serves breakfast until 10:30.
Cheers
Mike
Friday funnies
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