Jim really wanted to buy a motorcycle. He had been searching nearly every day, with no luck (he’s quite picky). One day he comes across a mint looking Harley with a ‘For Sale’ sign on it. The bike seems even better than a new one even though it’s 10 years old, really shiny and in absolute mint condition.
He immediately buys it, on the spot, and asks the seller how he kept it in such great condition for 10 years.
“Well, it’s quite simple, really,” says the seller
“whenever the bike is outside and it’s going to rain, rub Vaseline on the chrome. It protects it from the rain.” And he hands Jim a jar of Vaseline.
That night, his girlfriend Karen, invites him over to meet her parents. Naturally, they ride the bike over there. But, just before they enter the house, she stops him and says
“I have to tell you something about my family before we go in… When we eat dinner, we don’t talk. In fact, the first person who says anything during dinner has to do the dishes.”
“No problem,” he says. And in they go.
Jim is shocked at the sight. Right smack in the middle of the living room is a huge stack of dirty dishes. In the kitchen is another huge stack of dishes. Piled up on the stairs, in the corridor, everywhere he looks, dirty dishes.
They sit down to dinner and, of course, no one says a word. As dinner progresses, Jim decides to take advantage of the situation. He leans over and kisses Karen. No one says a word. He reaches over and fondles her breasts. Still, nobody says a word. He stands up, grabs her, rips her clothes off, throws her on the table, and screws her brains out right in front of her parents. His girlfriend is a little flustered, her dad is obviously livid, and her mum definately horrified, but, when he sits back down nobody says a word.
Jim, looking over at Karen’s mum, thinks to himself she’s pretty hot. So he grabs the mum, bends her over the dinner table, and has his way with her right there on the dinner table. His girlfriend is furious and her dad is boiling, but still, total silence.
All of a sudden there is a loud clap of thunder, and it starts to rain. Jim remembers his bike, so he pulls the jar of Vaseline from his pocket. Suddenly the father backs away from the table and shouts, “All right, thats enough, I’ll do the f**king dishes!”
ah dear So who snorted whilst laughing in the office!!! 